Powerless

My head is reeling. I powerwalk through the city trying hard not to cry. There's a knot in my throat. I finally reach the solitary haven of my musty room. 

I don't know why it hit me so hard. It's not the first, and definitely won't be the last time I see this, but somehow I'm overwhelmed and powerless, just like I felt in Chad, when Salomé died. I want to save them all, but I know I can't. My heart breaks. 

This is what happened: after brunch today, I start walking around, looking at little shops. I see a pre-pubescent girl tie a ballon-animal around the waist of a giggling todler. I smile and keep walking, but somehow the toddler ran ahead of me and entangled herself in my legs. She is giggling. She lifts her arms, and without thinking, I pick her up and realize she is naked from the waste down. I turn around to see her sister smile and come to me. I put the baby down and before I know it, the sister is begging me for food. "No money," she says, "just food." I look at her friend, who is carrying another toddler, a little boy. I say "Ok, I'll buy you food." 

We sit at a restaurant, and I ask the waitress for a menu. It's an italian restaurant. My guest looks at the menu and points to a pizza. The waitress looks at me and I acquiesce. I order a coffee for myself and a bottle of water for them. I ask their names and they tell me, but they're too foreign and I can't pronounce them, much less remember them.

I ask how old she is, and she tells me 20, then 14. I think she's 12. I ask her if she goes to school, and she says no. I ask her why and she shrugs. She speaks good English. I get a book out of my purse and ask if she can read, she says no. She can spell the letters though, "T-H-E" but can't form the word. 

The food arrives, and these little girls pounce. The little boy is on the other girl's lap and she's giving him food. The little girl, the one who stumbled into my legs, is sitting on her own chair and reaching for the pizza. It's too hot, she's going to burn herself. I sit next to her and start slowly feeding her with my hand. 

Then comes a man, walking with his hands, his atrophied legs dragging behind him. I offer him a slice of pizza, and he accepts without words. I hand him a slice of pizza and smile. I try not to think of Chad, and Paulin, and wonder if there's a way to find this man a tricycle. 

He has a sign around his neck that says he's 35, has 5 kids and sells books as the only way to support his family. I resolve to buy a book after he's done eating. 

The little kids are not talking, they're munching down on pizza and looking at their plates. 

I ask to see his books, and he has "At first they killed my father," a true story from a survivor of the Khmer Rouge who watched her dad get killed. I wanted to read that anyway. I offer him $5 dollars and he accepts with a smile. 

The kids are almost done eating. I am going to burst into tears if I stay much longer. I ask them to look at me as I take a picture, hug them, and tell them to take care. I tell them to go to school. To read books. All of that is probably impossible, but I say it anyway. 

I wave goodbye and walk away, as fast as I can. 

This world is too unfair. Yesterday, I spent 14hrs without my iPhone, feeling miserable and planning to buy a new one already. I was ready to spend $600 dollars in a damn phone, and these kids have nothing to eat. 

I am crying now, in my room, feeling powerless and angry at myself. I have so much, yet I complain because of minor inconveniences. I feel guilty. I could do so much more. 

My heart breaks. I miss Africa. I miss being able to do something, even if not very much, to ease the pain. To bring comfort, healing, peace. 

I don't know what to do... 

It's the end of the year, and with it comes new challenges and resolutions. If you're reading this, may I suggest that one of your resolutions for this year is to help someone, at least once? And I don't mean give money to a begger or a charity. I mean you, actually helping someone. Offer a meal, and sit with them while they eat. Go help in a soup kitchen or homeless shelter. Volunteer at an orphanage, hospital, jail. Do something to better this world. If we all join forces, we can make 2015 a better world. 

Welcome to the world of bribes and corruption... Or is it?

After a 2-week whirlwind tour of Vietnam which left me wanting more, although not exactly sad to leave, I got on a boat from Chau Doc in Vietnam, to Phnom Penh in Cambodia. 

The cruise through the Mekong was beautiful, bright sunny day, watching the world go by in fast-forward mode, as the boat sped north. 

After a while, we stopped at the Vietnam border, got off the boat and got our exit stamps on the passports. Back on the boat for 5 minutes, and we stopped at the Cambodian border. 

We had already handed our passports and $34 dollars to the boat guy, who gave all of our passports together to the border control. First problem: there's a big sign saying "Tourist Visa=$30 dollars". Where did the extra $4 go? Not sure if boat guy or border official. Couldn't do anything about it, had already given the money. 

I'm sitting quietly under a tree, reading a book about the struggles of a Northern Vietnam soldier after the war, when the boat guy comes and asks me if this is my passport. Apparently it expires in less than 6 months. The border guy is asking for a bribe. 

Triumphantly, I pull out my Uruguayan passport and say: "I'm not paying a bribe! *This* passport is valid until 2019!" So I go talk to the guy. However, he holds all the cards. He thought he was going to get a little extra padding in his pocket today, and by golly, he is getting it! 

He said he couldn't do it. That he had already seen my Brazilian passport. That *he'd get in trouble!* After making me wait there, and telling me I could go back to Vietnam (which was no longer an option, since I had already stamped out and had only a single-entry visa), he told the boat guy again (in Cambodian) to tell me to just pay his bribe of $20 dollars. 

I have a photo of the guy. I will update this after I leave Cambodia, just to make sure I actually get to leave! 

Sensing I had no choice in the matter, I grudgingly agreed, whereupon he instantly put the visa on my *Brazilian passport,* the one which supposedly wasn't acceptable because it expired in 5 months and 21 days -- less than 6 months. 

Outraged and impotent, I have, for the first time in my life, payed a bribe and therefore contributed to the cycle of corruption. I'm not happy about it. If I could, I would have actually gone back into Vietnam, gotten a Cambodian Visa from the embassy, and then come back. Alas, that was impossible, as I was trapped in no-man's land, having already legally exited Vietnam. 

Back on the boat, a German guy handed me the Cambodia Lonely Planet, where it says that though corruption exists everywhere in Asia, it has become an art-form in Cambodia. Great. Just great. 

I then continued reading my book until we reached Phnom Penh. 

Leaving the boat, I had to go get a bus immediately, as I have to arrive in Sihanoukville by this evening. Tuk-tuk drivers abound, as usual, and I resigned myself to be scammed once again, as I have no idea where the bus station is. I tell a guy yes, and start walking with him up to the wharf. He says there's a bus that leaves from nearby. I don't have to pay for a Tuk-Tuk, he'll show me. What? Did I hear this right? 

I keep walking, and he takes me to a place where they sell bus tickets. There are other foreigners waiting. He was still with me, so I expected to be quoted an inflated price, so he could get his kick-back. Nope. Normal price! 

Then he says "you have 30 minutes, maybe you're hungry", and as I acquiesce, he walks me to a street-food stall, where I pay $2 dollars for a heaping plate full of rice, veggies and fried chicken on top. He then says "Have a nice trip!" smiles, and waves goodbye. 

In short, I'm confused. I was expecting to be scammed at every turn, since even the police is openly asking for bribes. Little does this Tuk-tuk driver knows that he single-handedly erased the bad opinion I had already formed of his people, just a couple of hours earlier. 

Lesson learned: not everyone is corrupt, there are still honest and friendly souls out there. 

Hallelujah! 

Vietnam-- first impressions

I crossed the border from Laos into Vietnam yesterday morning. Very fast processing, stamp here, drive 4km in the bus, stamp there: Welcome to Vietnam! 

I arrived in Dien Bien Phu around noon. Time for my first Pho! 

Then I had to wait for 5hrs to get a sleeper bus to Hanoi. Well, I was in for a surprise! 

In South America we have pretty comfortable sleeper buses, but the Vietnamese took this to another level. 

There are bunk beds in the entire bus! Comfortable, completely flat, bunk beds, complete with pillow and blanket! 

(I slept through the night!)

The bus driver also had a sense of humor. We stopped (at the side of the road) for a bathroom break, and I was the last one out. When he saw me coming, he started driving away, just to make me run. I did, then he stopped, gave me his hand and we all laughed. :)

A little later we stopped for dinner. There were only another couple of foreigners on the bus, and they stayed on the bus. I got out because I was hungry. What isn't my surprise, when I see that everybody sits at long tables and shares the same food! Dinner with locals? Check! It was pretty tasty too! 

Arrived this morning at 5am, got a taxi to the hotel, but had to wait until someone checked out to get a room. So I went to walk around and have some food. 

(Someone reading by the lake)

At 11am I came back and got my room. 

Those are rose petals on the bed folks! 

As you can tell, my first impressions of Vietnam are extremely positive! :)

More to come!!

Wanna learn how to cook?

It's easy, here is what you do: 

1- find a small restaurant* with fantastic food.

2- go there a few times in a row, be nice, and compliment the chef repeatedly.

3- at breakfast one day, ask the chef if she'd teach you how to make your favorite dish. Tell her you just want to watch her cook, and cross your fingers. 

4- if she says yes, you're in luck! Don't press the subject, thank her and let a few hours pass.

5- come back between meal times, when the restaurant is empty and she has time to dedicate to you. Ask her again, and wait until she invites you into the kitchen! 

6- watch her every move, take pictures, smell and taste everything she touches. Write everything down.

7- thank her profusely, and eat the deliciousness she just prepared in front of you! :) 

This is how I learned to make Lao Mok Paa, something incredibly delicious and indescribable. If you're lucky, maybe I'll make it for you one day. :) 

*This probably won't work in a restaurant in your home town, simply because they'll want you to keep coming and not teach you their secrets!! Better to try it when traveling to faraway lands with exotic cuisines... 

The richest poor country in the world

I have been in love with Thailand for 10 years. Everybody who has heard me speak about Thailand (or even just from reading this blog) you can tell that I love Thailand, which is why I end up never leaving. I'm glad I did though, Laos is amazing!! 

However, I keep talking to people who mention how the people are dirt poor. They mention that the majority of the population live in rural areas and in a global scale, are considered below the poverty level because they don't earn so-many-dollars per capita per year.

Honestly, I don't see it. 

They live in little villages by the river, and subsist on some combination of sticky rice plus what they plant, the animals they keep (chickens, pigs, buffalo) and the fish they catch. 

You see fathers carrying babies, and mothers tickling toddlers who giggle adorably. They have plenty of food and water. They live in their own houses. The food is great. The weather is wonderful, and when it gets too hot, they jump in the river! The scenery is breath-taking and beautiful. There's no polution, no stress, no noise. They have schools and free health-care. I even walked into a hospital and it was squicky clean and empty (no crowds of patients waiting). The people are nice, helpful, happy. 

But don't take my word for it: here are some pictures:

(Friends and chickens)

(Drying rice)

(Typical houses) 

(Cooling off)

(Going out to fish)

(Big sister and chubby baby!)

(Sunset over the mountains)

(Silly foreigners -me- spinning around and making adorable little girls giggle)

Where is the poverty? Sure, they don't have any money... but they have no use for it. They have everything they need -- things that money can't buy... 

I guess I have a different definition of what it means to be rich or poor. To me, these people are the richest people I've ever met... 

The other side of the Mekong

I mentioned that I was forcing myself to leave Thailand and go to Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia, right?

Well, a few days ago I crossed the Mekong river from Thailand into Laos. It's beautiful here. The people are just as friendly as in Thailand, the food is similar (though not *quite* as good!), it's actually cheaper, and there are absolutely breathtaking places. 

(Sunset over the Mekong, looking onto Thailand on the other side)

Why didn't I come here sooner!? :) 

From the border town of Houay Xai, I took a local bus to Luang Namtha, a place close to a beautiful National Park of 96% protected forest. 

I met some people on the way, Sam from Spain and Pauline from France. We all wanted to do some trekking, so we decided to look for something and book together. 

The first day, after we booked our 3-day trip, we rented motorbikes and went out exploring. We were riding on this tiny road going up the mountains and passing by lots of little villages. 

Our lunch spot, by a little creek, high up in the mountains... 

Then back to town, shower and dinner. 

The next day, we started our tour at 9am. The first day was kayaking down the Namtha river.

(Sam and I on the kayak)

At first it was a little slow going, we had to paddle a lot and I was tired... Then we stopped for lunch and I got some more energy. 

In the afternoon the river was flowing faster, and we had quite a few rapids! It was a lot more fun, and a lot less work... :) 

Then we got to the village where we were going to spend the night and leave the kayaks. The people are cery friendly, and even though we can't really communicate with them, we tried to interact and somehow always understand each other... 

I was pretty exhausted, hadn't slept much at all the night before, so I went to bed early. 

The next day, the trekking was pretty tough. It was uphill most of the way, and I mean straight up, through the tropical jungle. But we made it, and the view from the top was incredible!! 

(Arriving at the top!!)

(Sunset panorama)

After sunset, Tanoi (our guide) cooked us dinner, and then we went back to the viewpoint to look at the stars for a while. Absolutely incredible!! I've been really lucky in this trip, with lots of opportunities to be in the middle of nowhere, with no light polution, no electricity, no internet, nothing. A chance to disconnect, look at the stars, and see the beauty of this world... 

On the third day we trekked back to the village, completely downhill, at knee-busting angles. Finished with a swim, and playing with the little kids from the village. 

(Namtha river)

(Adorable giggling girls spinning around)

Then back to Luang Nam Tha for a looong shower, dinner and bed!

My first 5 days in Laos have been amazing... :) 

News from Tchad!

I may be physically far away, but my mind is never too far. I have not forgotten my patients. Or Tchad. And as weird as that might seem, I miss it... 

So every once in a while, I ask for news... 

And I am happy to report that Irene came back for her check-up, her stump is all healed up and Dr. Scott sent her to the handicapped center to get a prosthesis. It'll probably be a peg leg (above knee amputations suck!) but it'll be enough to free her hands from the crutches, so she can carry her babies again. :) 

Gombo, one of the patients I was doing dressing changes twice a day and who kept producing pus and more pus, has also been discharged, healed, without infection. Hallelujah!! 

But the best news are about Blaise. He's the one I thought was going to lose his leg. The one I pumped full of antibiotics and also did dressing changes twice a day. When I left, he was off antibiotics and infection free, but still had 2 giant wounds which could get infected again any time. 

Well, he is doing great! He's still at the hospital, but the wounds are almost completely closed, and he has both legs and no infection. He will walk again. He will lead a normal life. A young, strong guy like him, would have been reduced to begging if he had lost his leg. Now he's got a chance at life. 

There are no words to describe how happy that makes me... :) it was not in vain. The fight payed off. 

That's Blaise, on my last day there... 

Surprised!

I have done a fair bit of traveling. And when you go to countries like India, Thailand, Nepal, Tibet, you see a fair amount of temples. Most of them are beautiful and full of intricate, delicate designs and paintings... but after a while, they start to blend together and you're no longer sure which one is which... 

However, today I was in for a surprise. 

Around Chiang Rai there are a lot of places to see, waterfalls, temples, villages... but they're spread out a few kilometers in every direction, so I rented a motorbike (ok, it's a scooter!), looked up some maps, and started off. 

After a few kilometers, there was a sign and I turned right off the highway: immediately, I saw the temple and couldn't believe my eyes. 

It's incredible. It is simply incredible. All white with delicate designs made with tiny mirror squares that make it shimmer with the light, and it just took me by surprise... 

There are also some creepy details, like the sea of hands from the underworld reaching out to you as you cross the bridge onto the temple: 

A bottle of whisky on top of a very scary sculpture: 

Or heads hanging from trees with weeds growing out of them: 

But back to the temple: 

Definitely one that will stick in my memory and will not blend in with the others... 

Wat Rong Khun, or simply: The White Temple

The happiest place on earth...

Forget Disneyland! Thailand is the happiest place on earth! The name of the country literally means "Land of Smiles". Boy, did they get that right! 

Just landing in Thailand puts a smile on my face. I can't think of a single thing I don't like about this place. The food is fantastic. The people are lovely, friendly and helpful (without trying to sell you a thing!) the weather is great. The beaches are beautiful. The diving is incredible. The prices are cheap. It is easy, with an excelent tourist infrastructure. It is safe (even for a woman solo-traveler). 

Even if you say there are a lot of tourists, yes, true, but not everywhere. There are SO MANY incredible places out of the tourist trail, it's easy to avoid them if you want. 

This is my 3rd visit, and this time, I'm actually *forcing* myself to leave, in order to visit the neighbouring countries (Laos/Cambodia/Vietnam) which I keep wanting to see but always end up getting stuck here. Went to get my Vietnam visa today, so this time it is happening!!! 

But first, I think I'll have another Pad Thai... ;) 

The roof of the world!

I wrote this post a few days ago, but since blogger is blocked in China, and I can´t manage to make the vpn work on my phone, I am only now able to post...

Tibet

Breath-taking. That word pretty much describes my experience in Tibet.

It's a very good thing that I had done the Annapurna Circuit Trek, where I had hiked up to 4,000m before coming to Tibet. On this tour, the first night we stayed at Zhangmu, the border town between Nepal and Tibet. Altitude: 2250m. 

The second night, we stayed at Tingri, altitude: 4,250m!! That's an altitude gain of exactly 2,000m! That's the highest I've ever slept, and incredibly, other than a very mild headache and a little trouble falling asleep, I had no issues. I was even running! Compare to Bolivia, where I could literally, barely walk, and spent the whole night gasping for air, and I'll say acclimatization is awesome. Our bodies really are incredible... 

We're happily driving down the road when our guide, Pema, unceremoniously announces that the pointy peak in the middle is Mt. Everest. I was not prepared. This is it, the tallest mountain in the world, in front of me!! And I'm driving straight to it! 

I couldn't help thinking of God's promise that He has thoughts for our good (Jer. 29:11) and that as far as the heavens are above the earth, so are His thoughts higher than our thoughts... (Ps. 103:11)

As C.S.Lewis would put it, we are far too easily pleased... He wants to give us so much more!!! 

Anyway, when we stopped at Tingri, I met a group of very nice people doing the same tour (albeit with different guides/drivers/cars) and we went up the hills behind Tingri to watch the sunset *and* the sunrise over Mt. Everest. Pictures don't do it justice, but I'm just giddy. I have this silly grin on my face and I just can't erase it. I'm in Tibet. I have seen Mt. Everest. I can die happy now. :) 

I will stop writing now and just post some pictures... :) 

Koen and I when we first scrambled up the hills, early afternoon...

Sunset with bird... 

Mt. Everest is actually the one on the far left... 

Sunset panorama

Sunrise...

Sunrise panorama

Again, Everest is the pointy one on the left...

This is the closest you can get without a special permit: 75km!

Last view from the road, on the way to Shigatse...

Group photo! From left to right: Yan, Niek, Dina, Koen, Sam, Fay and I

Jump! :) 

Last one at the Gyatchu La pass, at 5,248m! Leaving mt. Qomolagma Nature Reserve...

Tired...

Everyone who has ever traveled for long periods of time knows this: sometimes you just get tired. Traveling is great, possibly the greatest thing in the world, but it takes a lot out of you...

Usually, it takes longer than a month though... but maybe it's because I was already exhausted after Africa. 

I'm leaving Nepal tomorrow, and that makes me a little sad. I really like Nepal! But for the first time in my life, I am actually happy that it's an organized tour and for the next 7 days, I don't have to think much... (the only way to go to Tibet is with an organized tour, otherwise I would never actually book a tour, tired or not!) 

Anyway... After Tibet I have a few days in Chengdu, China, then flying to Bangkok... the familiar and happy bustle of Khao San Road, and soon thereafter, the amazing tranquility of diving. 

I'm definitely looking forward to that... :) 

I leave you with a picture of Durbar Square, Kathmandu, and its massive population of pigeons...